Just when I'm thinking, "I'm exhausted, I'm grumpy and I'm just sad that everyone is pregnant and having babies without me" an unopened bottle of Diet Mt. Dew rolls out from under a seat in the car like ultimate proof that God loves me!
God doesn't always make himself known in massive, miraculous displays of affection that change our lives forever. Sometimes he takes the time to give us small, tender mercies that say, "I'm aware of you, I'm aware of how you've been feeling. I hear you, I'm here for you, and I love you."
Sometimes it is hard to accept God's timing, and it is especially hard when our desire is so righteous. Its not like I've been praying for God to make me a millionaire for the last 3 years. I've been praying for a child. Honestly, there have been times when I have wondered where God was and why he wasn't answering my plea. Why didn't he think I deserved to be a mother? Why wouldn't he answer me? I guess I have a hard time remembering that "No" is also an answer.
We get caught up in this idea that if we are good and God loves us then we'll just get the righteous desires of our hearts. Well, if that were the case this life would be WAY too easy. We aren't here for easy. We aren't here for only, "Yes!" answers. Sometimes God tells us "No" or "Not right now." We just have to have the faith to trust in him and keep going, because we cannot measure his love by the number of times he says "Yes" to us.
God's love is measured in blessings and, despite the things we do not have, there are always things to be grateful for!
God's love for me is measured by a sweet husband who loves me no matter what, makes me laugh when I want to cry, and fills my life with happiness.
God's love for me is measured by a family that supports and lifts us through our trials, who never give up on us and endure with us.
God's love for me is measured by a text that says "I've been thinking about you."
God's love for me is measured by a phone call just when I needed it.
God's love for me is measured by kisses from nephews.
God's love for me is measured by hugs from moms or blessings from dads.
God's love for me is measured by a church talk that is everything I needed to hear.
God's love for me is measured by a treat left on my desk at work.
...and God's love is measured in a 24 oz bottle of Diet Mt. Dew.
Look for the little miracles. Count your blessings. God loves you, even if the answer to your question is "No."
XO.
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